Tony's Freaken Sweet Web Site

Dear Diary

12/08/08

If you're a true geek, you know the the LHC (Large Hadron Collider) is coming online this year. As you all know, it's designed to test the Standard Model of Physics and will create black holes that will swallow the earth and surrounding solar system (well, in Hollywood and scaremongering from the types of people who truly believe the Earth is flat perhaps).

I know you're already damn excited about what physicists will find when they smash protons together near the speed of light, but just to push you right over the edge, you have to check out this video.

Damn and I thought I was geeky!

29/07/08

Check it out! Human Foozball! Saw it at a pub in Clapham common on Sun:

17/07/08

Amusing news story in the Metro this morning:

Basically, this fu*ktard committed a bunch of crimes and uploaded videos of himself doing it to youtube. Surprise, surprise the police used it to convict him. OK, he's freaken stupid.

What's more stupid than that you say? Oh, I think the SENTENCING! Instead of saying, "Look, you're a fu*ken little shit, go and sweep streets for the next two years and don't ever do it again or you'll get your ass thrown in jail with Bubba" (like the court of Tony would do), he was given an Asbo(Anti-Social Behaviour Order) banning him from posting any more of his clips, boasting about the crimes he commits for TWO YEARS.

Woop-de-freaken-do-da. That'll learn him.

03/07/08

Well holy freaken shiitballs batman, would someone please help me pick my jaw up off the ground.

Landmark research from Durham University confirms that:

"a good grade at A-level in chemistry, maths or physics is harder to achieve than a good grade in psychology or media studies."

In further groundbreaking research, it's found that things fall down if let go.

04/06/08

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I love shiit like this:

Gun T-shirt 'was a security risk'

A man wearing a T-shirt depicting a cartoon character holding a gun was stopped from boarding a flight by the security at Heathrow's Terminal 5

I mean, freaken heck, it's Optimus Prime! He's the good guy! I could understand if it was Megatron...

Seriously, I'd like to say "it's unbelievable that a guy wearing a Transformers T-shit can be classified as security risk", but it's the UK, so no, pretty standard shiit from retards in power.

Also, London city airport was closed when a bomb was found. You might say "well, bloody well fair enough!!!", but it was a World War 2 bomb, dug up out of the ground, 5KM away. Can someone seriously tell me how the fu<k that demands that an airport is shut down??? Seriously, I can't work it out!

19/05/08

Wow, this is simply the best example of a well put together fight scene that I've ever seen. It just keeps on getting better and better.

Wow.

01/05/08

Here's a time-lapse video of cranes operating in the distance from my work's office:

25/04/08

Bridget and I moved in to our new place last Fri (1 min walk to Putney Overland).

Here's the view from the front door when I got home last evening at twilight:

23/04/08

You can file this under the "only in the UK" folder.

A person I know is trying to register with a new doctor. Their previous doctor forwarded the wrong records to the new doctor.

You'd think it would be a case of the new doctor ringing up the old doctor and asking them to resend the correct records, but no.

The person I know has just had a phone call from the new doctor, telling them that they have to send in their birth certificate as well as proof of their previous address even though they have been living at their current address since the age of 4!

I'd shake my head in disbelief, but it's such a typical story over here.

17/04/08

OK, I'm posting this like to a video of a dude winning a big wave competition because it's pretty cool.

What I don't get, is that the reported says: "despite coming dangerously close to a wipe out, he held on to scoop the award".

The video clearly shows him getting blasted in to the side of the wave and cart wheeling through the air to get cleaned up by the rest of the wave!!! Damn, I'd hate to see a real wipe out if THAT doesn't count as one...

If ya wanna see a pretty cool big wave surfing vid, check out this one.

My favourite quotes out of the video:

A fall in a wave like this one means almost certain death.

It was only like 12 to 15 feet but real glassy.

Unfortunately you never really know what your limit is until you cross it.

14/04/08

Ay up govnr, I passed the 'life in the UK' test last Fri (the one the UK home office makes you sit to prove i can read and understand English).

Bottles of bubbly to be opened over this surprise achievement, no need for my honours university degree with this puppy in my hand.

One step closer on the road to not being booted out of the UK on the 28th May. Debating if this will be a good or bad thing at any rate...

10/04/08

OK, I nearly had a stroke this morning when I read the BBC. My recent moaning has strongly centred around just how shiit the UK is at sorting out basic things like, oh, baggage handling at a brand new multi-billion terminal (not working because baggage handlers weren't shown how to log on to PC's), etc, etc, etc...

But THIS article has totally spasticated my brain to a whole new level:

Teacake set to cost taxman £3.5m

WHAT THE FU<KEN WHAT?!!!!!

Are you telling me it took TWENTY FU<KEN YEARS for authorities to work out that a teacake was a cake?

Seriously, if you were an MP and someone said "oi, stop charging vat on teaCAKEs in case you have to refund it!" wouldn't you have to be the most greedy baaastard in the world to then go "nah, tell granny she can fu<k off and bl00dy well pay vat on the teaCAKE she has each morning with a cuppa"?!?!?!

How fu<ken hard would it have been to wander down to M&S to bl00dy well buy one to find out? I mean it has the freaken word CAKE in it!!! TeaCAKE people, teaCAKE!!!!!!!

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

09/04/08

My bro Phil has graduated from Waikato Uni!!!!!

Congratulations bro! I'm pretty stoked for ya!

08/04/08

There are so many things that do my head in when dealing with UK government agencies.

This one just really made me shake my head though, WHAT am I missing here...

On the Wandsworth council WEB site, they have a SIGN LANGUAGE video, telling people of their services...

Why the hell can't def people just READ the freaken web site like every bl00dy one else! Wouldn't it make more sense to have a MP3 describing their services to help the BLIND? Not surprisingly, the video has no sound, so it would be useless to blind people...

04/04/08

Just in case you thought I was exaggerating Crazy's fall (see Dear Diary posting below), Crazy has sent me pics showing the damage.

It's worse when he shows you in person! You can't help but say "HOLY SHIIIIT!!!" when you see it...

01/04/08

I thought I'd post this to serve as a warning to everyone (and for shock value entertainment).

Although I'm posting this on April the 1st, it's not an April fools joke! Happened a couple of days ago. I'll put up a full page of amusing and scenic photos of our Engelberg snowboard trip soon.

John sent out this email:

...I accidentally fwucked myself up on the weekend in Engelberg, Switzerland.

Check out the image enclosed to get a feel for the magnitude of my most recent error of judgement.

I've had to take the day off today, tomorrow - and I'll have to then re-evaluate Wednesday onward.

Basically my lower back, right torso and arm got smashed up (although no tail-bone, skin savaged or bones were broken which is a bonus!).

My whole lower back has puffed up massive and it took me a good three or four minutes to get out of bed at lunch-time as the body wasn't responding to the brains signals; strange sensation. Very scary. Literally was incapacitated (seems much better when upright though).

Anyways; have a giggle at my expense...

Cheers,

John

I replied with this:

Just to clarify the numbers and line that crazy added on the pic I took (which doesn’t really show just how steep everything is, I took the pic pointing the camera up hill). Near the beginning of the line is where crazy decided to detour from the trail that I scouted out and Matt took. I started screaming “NO, NO!!!!” as I knew that what was going through Crazy’s head would’ve been “hmm, fresh untracked powder! I’ll carve THAT up!”.

Crazy managed to stop and fall on his arse at point 1 just as he heard Matt yelling “NOOOOO” as well, but by then it was too late. He paused at that point for about 1 second before he lost traction on the glacier ice just below the wind swept powder and started bouncing and falling down to point 2, snowboard first fortunately...

At point 2 after he had gathered quite a bit of speed sliding down the ice face, his snowboard hit the powdery bit which caused him to perform a couple of sideways cartwheels and flip before he finally slammed in to the power/ice at point 3. He bounced back up in to the air at least once, limbs flailing about uncontrollably as he flipped through the air, doing about 2 summersaults until he crashed back down at that first shadow in the snow. It was at this point I knew I’d have to call emergency services to air lift him out. He continued to roll, flip, tumble through the powder and air until he finally slid to a stop where you can see him with Matt in the pic.

Astoundingly, after only 5 or so second of lying in a limp, crumpled heap in the power, Crazy lifted an arm up, which I’m damn glad he did because at that point I had no idea if he was alive, it was quite a horrific fall to witness. Matt traversed over to him, he eventually sat up and after 5-10mins of rest he very cautiously made his way down the mountain while Matt and I continued the best powder run of the trip.

The pic also doesn’t really give justice to the distance he fell. If you take Matt who is standing up, shrink him down a wee bit more to take in to account how much closer he is to the camera than the cliff and then stack him end to end from point 1 to 3, you’ll have more of an idea.

I’ve also attached another pic showing the overall mountain face that Crazy knew he was going down with an arrow pointing to the point where this all happened.

Crazy, I’ve seen you use up about 8 lives now over the years. You have no more left. Please don’t make any more judgement calls involving safety. Every time you feel pain over the next few weeks, think of what I’ve just said.

Hope you get better soon!

Tony.

18/03/08

Do you think the UK population is homophobic (which I wouldn't have thought, personally)?

Check out the top playground taunts showing percent of teachers that have heard the word from students (from this BBC article):

I'd say that sissy is the only non-s3xual taunt.

03/02/08

I watched a bit of the Super Bowl, while eating "Shrimp and Grits" (no kidding, I ordered it when my boss pointed it out on the menu). The New York Giants won. After it was over they were yelling out "WE'RE THE BEST IN THE WORLD!!!".

No offence, but what non-Americans play American football against the Americans in the Super Bowl? Is there some token country that they let in, just so they can say "we're the best in the world" or what? If so, has there EVER been a final without two American teams in it?

Seriously, let me know if you know, I'm not trying to stir shiit here! E-mail me

Well, OK, perhaps I'm stirring a little bit of shiit, but I still don't know the answer!

02/02/08

Few people (unless you're a true geek or live in Boston) will probably get the significance of the date 31st Jan 2007 (that date's written in a way that everyone in the world can understand), but if you do, you'll probably find this EXTRA amusing like myself:

I got that image from this site,

30/01/08

I went to see Linkin Park last Sat with Crazy and James and they were pretty sweet! Here's a few snaps I took on my phone.

Before they came out:

And some snaps during the concert:

While I was going through the snaps on my phone, I also came across these:

Stef, Chris, me, Matt and James, looking particularly tanked:

Matt and I (really don't know what prompted this face pulling):

 

17/01/08

Ohh, my first Dear Diary posting of 2008! Happy new year then!

Wish I could start the new year off with some GOOD news, but I'm afraid I'm using this posting for a moan.

Terrorists, I'm sick of your shiit now, you've finally stepped over THE line, and that line would be MY line. Not that I've ever condoned your crazy craap, but you haven't really affected me that much (minus you all fu<king up airport security for me).

The straw that has broken the camel's back happened this morning while I was reading my Metro on the way to work. If you're not aware, the usual nut jobs have boarded a whaling boat which always makes for entertaining reading, well has always done so in the past. But all this terrorist media storm craap has DESTROYED what could've been a damn funny article!

Here's the shiit I had to read this morning:

WTF?! The Greenies are calling the whalers terrorists and the whalers are calling the Greenies terrorists!!! WHERE THE HELL IS THE IMAGINATION!!!

Here's what I expected/wanted to read to make my day:

A bunch of Green activists were still locked up on board a Japanese ship yesterday, as whalers and protesters accused each other of being a pack of waankers.
Whaling has been stopped while Australian Benjamin Potts and Briton Giles Lane, who were held after boarding the vessel on Tues, remained on board the Japanese Fisheries Agency said.
The whalers, working in the Southern Ocean said they would release the men only if they promised to stopped smoking so much weed, which was causing them to pilot their ship in such a wild fashion that they kept on smacking in to the side of their whaling ship.
But Paul Watson, captain of protest vessel Steve Irwin rejected the terms. "Those fu*ktard whalers have been cooking up some damn fine feeds and wafting the smell towards us on PURPOSE! Of course we're gonna come over as ask for some bacon and eggs, I mean VEGAN bacon and eggs. That's the hallmark of being a pack of waankers".
A letter from Japan's Institute of Cetacean Research called the anti-whaling activists "a bunch of pot-smoking hippie wankers" for illegally boarding a ship on the high seas in what could be seen as an act of "pricks".

But no, all I got to read was "You're a bunch of TERRORISTS", "No, YOU'RE a bunch of terrorists". Whoop-de-freaken-shiit.

If you're a terrorist and you're reading this, I'm sure even you'll have to agree to cut out all your bullshiit now.

---

Dear Diary Archive

Your Say

email here for your say

What's "Your Say" about?

13/08/08

Crazy sent in a public safety announcement for my web site (yeah, I know, ironic, ay?!)

I'm sure you all know NOT to throw water on to a grease fire in your kitchen.

You probably don't know why you shouldn't, it's because the water will sink to the bottom of the grease, superheat to steam and basically exploded the oil all over the bl00dy place.

Here's a video showing it in action.

Also, don't throw water on to electrical fires or your Mum.

25/07/08

Great, NZ makes it in to the news on the other side of the world again and it just so happens to be MY HOME CITY!

I was sent this link to the BBC article by more than one person, with Rebecca saying:

You have to check this article out.  Quite possibly the funniest thing I have read in a very long time.  We are still in tears in the office.

And just to top it all off, this morning in my copy of the Metro I see this article:

Yep, some dipsticks back home decided to call their daughter "Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii" and, surprisingly, she didn't like it and a judge back in New Plymouth said she could change it.

Well, I guess it's better to read news like that than something involving the latest knife crime fad in London.

17/07/08

Crazy sent around this damn funny beatbox vid. A must see!

09/07/08

Petra sent around some AWESOME pics that she's taken recently:

Greg sent me this rather amusing "Inspirational" style poster:

And Crazy sent an email titled "Leave it to the Japanese...cleaver" which a bunch of cool pics.

26/06/08

My Mum sent me this email about my Majorca page (won't make much sense until you've seen it first):

Hi hon.  Just had a look at your Majorca photos.  Yes, I absolutely looooved your postcard.  I'm having great fun with it telling everyone proudly that it's a photo of my son!!  It's hard to keep a straight face sometimes at the look I get.  Anyhow, I believe in sharing a little joy around, so it's in my car on the dash now, so anyone walking past my car can get a good look also.

Tyla saw it one day and stared at it for ages.  Then she said "is this my daddy?"  Nope, I said, it's just a man keeping himself sunsafe.  "Oh, that's a good idea Mammma, I keep my hat on too, but I only got one hat". 

"Uhha, that's cos you've got olive skin and don't need two hats".  She thought for a while and then said "Uh ha, I've got liv skin haven't I?"

Yep, I said, it's good to have liv skin.  And that was the end of the conversation.  === Lucky escape for me, I thought.

Luv Mum 

10/06/08

Crazy sent around pics, titled "When it's OK to say s**t"

When I responded with "Damn, that's one of the funnier ones you've sent! Classic"

he responded with "Those poor little ducklings... :("

Ohhhhh! I'll give you a big ol' hug, crazy! Personally, I'd say "That poor freaken HORSE!" :-)

01/05/08

Chris sent around "Motivational Posters" and says:

I usually don't forward this stuff on but, fuxk it.

I liked the last one.  the caption makes it.

I was giggling like an idiot reading them...

 

Petra sent around the anatomy of a one night stand. Fantastic!

21/04/08

Crazy sent around a couple of amusing videos:
Homemade Olympics
Cucumber Sandwich

Lisa sent me this, saying "I swear this was really written by you and not some guy from Maidenhead" and I'd have to agree (especially as I'm in the middle of applying for Indefinite Leave to Remain):

Dear Minister,

I'm in the process of renewing my passport but I am a total loss to understand or believe the hoops I am being asked to jump through.
How is it that Bert Smith of T.V. Rentals Basingstoke has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a satellite dish from them back in 1994, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date?

How come that nice West African immigrant chappy who comes round every Thursday night with his DVD rentals van can tell me every film or video I have had out since he started his business up eleven years ago, yet you still want me to remind you of my last three jobs, two of which were with contractors working for the government?

How come the T.V. detector van can tell if my T.V. is on, what channel I am watching and whether I have paid my licence or not, and yet if I win the government run lottery they have no idea I have won or where I am and will keep the bloody money to themselves if I fail to claim in good time.
Do you people do this by hand?

You have my birth date on numerous files you hold on me, including the one with all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 30-odd years.
It's on my health insurance card, my driver's licence, on the last four passports I've had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the planes and boats over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done every ten years and the electoral registration forms I have to complete, by law, every time our lords and masters are up for re-election.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, I was born in Maidenhead on the 4th of March 1957, my mother's name is Mary, her maiden name was Reynolds, my father's name is Robert, and I'd be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and the day I die!

I apologise Minister. I'm obviously not myself this morning. But between you and me, I have simply had enough! You mail the application to my house, then you ask me for my address. What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthals working there? Look at my damn picture.. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to activate the Fifth Reich for God's sake! I just want to go and park my weary backside on a sunny, sandy beach for a couple of week's well-earned rest away from all this crap.

Well, I have to go now, because I have to go to back to Salisbury and get another copy of my birth certificate because you lost the last one.
AND to the tune of 60 quid! What a racket THAT is!! Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day? But nooooo, that'd be too damn easy and maybe make sense. You'd rather have us running all
over the place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some ****** to confirm that it's really me on the goddamn picture - you know... the one where we're not allowed to smile in in case we look as if we are enjoying the process!
Hey, you know why we can't smile? 'Cause we're totally jacked off!

I served in the armed forces for more than 25 years including over ten years at the Ministry of Defence in London. I have had security clearances which allowed me to sit in the Cabinet Office, five seats away from the Prime Minister while he was being briefed on the first Gulf War and I have been doing volunteer work for the British Red
Cross ever since I left the Services. However, I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am -- you know, someone like my doctor... who, before he got his medical degree 6 months ago WAS LIVING IN PAKISTAN....

Yours sincerely,
An Irate British Citizen.

09/04/08

Holy craaap! Check this video out!!! Crazy sent it, titled "What happened when the Health and Safety Officer had a day off"... I can see this happening in London before long...

Crazy also sent in this cool vid, titled "Pete".

08/04/08

BAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Nah, seriously:

HAHAHAHAHAHA, HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA, HAHAHAHAAAAA!

NZ might have stories about hedgehogs being used as weapons and homeless people smoking pot, but AUSTRALIA has stories like the following which show up in UK papers:

Reunited father and daughter have a child together

Monday, 07 April 2008 A woman who has given birth to her fathers child is demanding 'respect and understanding' about their relationship.

Jenny Deeves, 31, had sex with her father two weeks after the pair were reunited 30 years after her father John separated from Jenny's mother.

Soon after meeting again, Ms Deeves says she began to see beyond familial ties and regard her father as a man first and foremost.

The couple's 11-month-old baby Celeste, appears fit and healthy. Ms Deeves told Australian news station Nine Network: "We are just asking for a little respect and understanding.

"John and I are in this relationship as consenting adults."

She admitted looking at her father like you might look at a man across the bar in a nightclub. About having sex with her father she said: "It was like a sexual relationship with any other man."

Ms Deeves already has two children with a former partner.

John Deeves said: "Emotions take over. I knew it was illegal. Of course I knew it was illegal but you know, so what."

In virtually all Australian states incest is illegal with the crime in South Australia carrying a maximum seven years in jail. South Australian police are monitoring the couple.

HAHAHAHAHAHA, HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA, HAHAHAHAAAAA!

07/04/08

Of all the turmoil going on in the world at the moment, it's good to see that when New Zealand makes news on the BBC, it continues to do so in style:

NZ man 'used hedgehog as weapon'

03/04/08

Stef says (regarding Your Say posting on 26/03/08):

Not really impressed with your cuzzy Tania's joke on your website.

So i reply with the following:

An Aussie, a Kiwi, and a South African are at a bar one night having a beer. All of a sudden the South African drinks his beer, takes off his diamond encrusted watch, pulls out a gun shoots the watch to pieces. He says "In Seth Efrika we have so many diamonds that we don't need to wear the same diamond twice".

The Kiwi (obviously impressed by this) drinks his beer throw his glass into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the glass to pieces. He says "Wull mate, in Niw Zulland we have so much sand to make the glass that we don't need to drink out of the same cup twice".

The Australian then pulls out his gun and shoots the Kiwi.

Yeah, real funny stuff there, Stef...

26/03/08

Cuzzy Tania sent this joke in:

Subject: Joke of the year (NZ) 2007

  Two Aussies are sitting down for a break in their about-to-be-opened new store . As yet, the store isn't ready although the shelving is all in place.
 
 One says to the other, 'I bet any minute now some dork of a tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window and ask what we're selling.'
 
 No sooner are the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious bloke walks to the window, has a peek, and in a Kiwi accent asks, 'What're yer sellin' here?'
 
 One of the men replies, 'We're selling arse holes here mate.'
 
 Without missing a beat, the Kiwi says, 'Geez, you must have had a bloody good day, you've only got two left!' 

17/03/08

Karin sent this around, with the subject "From friends visiting Auckland":

You'll probably only get that if you're a New Zealander... 'Wh' is pronounced like a 'F'

Crazy also sent around 5 amusing videos:
one
two
three
four
five
Who said Americans don't have a good sense of humour?!

13/03/08

SOMEONE who shall be kept nameless sent me this atrocious "joke":

Being a wholesome Catholic (I think) I'm posting this to SHAME the cuzzy person behind this.

19/02/08

My Workmate, Lisa, sent me some cool pics, titled "Cloning Gone Wrong".

Here are 5 of my favourites, click any one of them to see all 24!

15/02/08

Shane sent this around:

Love it :-)

13/02/08

My workmate Mark sent me a link to the Astrological Magazine online. Pure class. Summarises my believes in Astrology quite perfectly.

I've saved a copy here, in case it changes.

08/02/08

My Boss sent me a cool set of pics of an A340-600 wreck with an amusing story behind it (for starters, it was never flown), no-one was killed (I checked):

I also got more cool pics from Crazy, showing a whipped up ocean north of Sydney, here's an example:

05/02/08

Crazy sent around an email showing "Entries for an art contest at the  Hirshorn  Modern  Art  Gallery  in DC, The  rule was that the artist could use only one sheet of  paper."

pretty damn cool!

01/02/08

My Cuzzy Brenda sent this trick in:

For anyone that wants to try, go to www.google.com type in  ' find chuck Norris'  , and hit I’m feeling lucky

30/01/07

Bridget and I were bored one evening, so we wrote an Amazon review (Scroll down to read the review) for something Bridget came across.

Here's a link to a backup of the page in case the review/item gets deleted :-)

25/01/07

Jenny sent around a screenshot of the Maori Facebook (HIGHLY culturally insensitive):

Bridget sends in these amazingly simple home remedies:

1. If you're choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

2. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you'll be afraid to cough.

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

8. If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

9. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Karen sends in this SHOCKING news article (serious, this isn't made up):

Blanket Man guilty on cannabis charge
NZPA | Tuesday, 22 January 2008

Wellington's well-known street person, Bernett Hana, known as Blanket Man, pleaded guilty to possession of cannabis when he appeared in Wellington District Court today.

At 7pm on Friday Hana was arrested on Courtenay Place in central Wellington for possession of five tinned foil bullets containing cannabis leaves.

He pleaded guilty to the charge and was remanded on bail to be sentenced when he reappeared on February 12 to face other cannabis charges.

Hana appeared in the dock wrapped in his trademark blanket.

DRUGS CHARGE: Bernett Hana, aka Blanket Man, has been charged for possession of cannabis.

Looks like ANYONE is capable of carrying cannabis in NZ these days.

Although Karin said, she'd be more surprised to find out that he WASN'T carrying cannabis...

22/01/07

Crazy sent me this joke, it's pretty classic:

A young man called Ron wanted to buy a Birthday present for his new girlfriend. They hadn't been seeing each other for very long and she lived a considerable distance away. He consulted with his sister and decided after careful consideration, that a pair of good quality gloves would strike the right note, not too romantic and not too  personal. Off he went with his sister to Harrods ladies dept and they selected a dainty pair of fur lined quality leather gloves.     

His sister bought a pair of knickers for herself at the same time. Harrods had a free gift wrap offer but the assistant mixed up the two items, the sister got the gloves and Ron got the knickers. 

Good old Ron sent off his gift wrapped present in a parcel with the following letter:

Dear Sasha,

I chose these because I've noticed that you  are not wearing any when we go out in the evenings. If it had not been for my sister I would have chosen the long ones with buttons, but she wears shorter ones (which are easier to remove) These are a very delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three weeks and they were hardly soiled at all.

I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart in  them even though were a little bit tight on her.  She also said that they rub against her ring which helps keep it clean.  In fact she hasn't needed to clean it since she began wearing them. I wish I was there to put them on for you the first time, as no doubt many other hands will touch them before I have a chance to see you again ..

When you take them off remember to blow into them a little bit because they will be naturally a little damp from wearing. 
Just imagine how many times my lips will kiss them during the coming year. I hope you will wear them for me on our next date.

All my love

Ron

P.S. My mum tells me that the latest style is to wear them folded down with a little bit of fur showing

11/01/07

Bridget sent around this drawing:

She didn't say who drew it... ;-)

10/01/07

Andrew sent me a couple of links to vids.

One to Magic Finger, which cracked me up.

A classic Billy T sketch. Brilliant!

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